S&M In the Mainstream

[akiravn1]

More so than "Asian fetish", this phenomenon is referred to as "Yellow Fever" and the males who have it "rice eaters" LOLOL

I'm not saying it's right or wrong, complementary or derogatory. It's just an obvious trend that appears to have resurfaced at some point congruous with the popularity of manga, anime, and cosplay. This is the second wave that I'm aware of, the first being "Orientalism" when non-Asians were fascinated with all things from The Orient in the early 19th century.

 

The common stereotype isn't necessarily about the submissiveness of females, but the distinctively Asian-ness to our upbringing and lives. We are neat and educated. We have high standards but are modest (ha). We do not model our behavior after the likes of Britney Spears or Paris Hilton, we opt for academia, classical music, and tennis. LOL

 

Have you ever read Tiger Mother by Amy Chua? It's a memoir of the author's upbringing by her typically Chinese mother and how she continues the tradition on her own children in a very self-aware manner. Much controversy was had over that book mainly because most Chinese would never dishonor or exploit their own families like that.

 

I do find some "rice eaters" to be repelling. Even repulsive. That's probably the experience of whomever you overheard. If they see an Asian girl, they're on her like flies to shit. She could be totally fobby or tattooed with green hair. Just as long as she's Asian. It's a trophy mentality and it disgusts me a little to have so little regard for a person's spirit and personality. To see them as an object to be won and possessed.

On the other hand, I have also experienced males who find the Asian race of females to be physically attractive, but that's about it. They're not laden with illusions about how we are all actually ninjas, or zen masters, or amazing cooks. It's purely physical so there's room for growth. The important difference is whether one honors an Asian female as an individual or a commodity.

 

mZ,

 

I loved reading this post as I have often wondered about the view of an intelligent Asian female regarding "rice eaters". I always felt that I could easily be described in this manner. I am one that does find the Asian race of females to be physically attractive, but at the same time do not feel that I possess a trophy mentality where Asian women are concerned. I love what I see as pure individuality, as you pointed out, not modeling one self after a popular celebrity. Asian culture has always interested me as well. I guess if my love for Asian women were misunderstood and I were to discover that they found me to be repelling or repulsive, I honestly would feel devastated. Thanks for revealing Your thoughts on a subject which I find most interesting.

[Mistress Zhao]

Thank you Mistress Zhao, I hadn't expected to be reminded of "Orientalism". As I understood it, Europeans considered virtually anything south or east of Europe to be Oriental. This included North Africa and the Middle East, which is the context in which I had first been exposed to the idea of Orientalism. Nonetheless, I understand your original comment now on the trendyness of all things Asian in this time as a fascination with all things different. As with the Orientalism of the 19th century maybe there are good aspects and bad aspects to this fascination, new ideas hopefully permeate into the consciousness of society and become apart of it, bettering everybody through cultural exchange. At the same time, and this is really the problem that you have explained very well, this fascination also serves to pigeonhole and dehumanize, stripping individuals of their unique importance that is usually afforded to those "non-oriental" or within the group. This extends to stripping entire nations of humanity and leads to many people simply expecting certain actions or behaviors on the world stage as congruent with the behavior of the "other". Also that being said, this is also a two-way street and I would dare say that the non-european nations have had their fair share of Euro-philes and those obsessed with very distorted images of America, good or bad. I would say though, that on the whole, the development of both Western and Eastern nations has been positively influenced by their interchange of ideas and people Europe was transformed by the crusades and later the trading expeditions to the "orient" and Asian nations have been revitalized by adopting Western style reforms historically and today it is fascinating to watch China grapple with reform, while still seeking to remain distinctly "Chinese".

 

I have never heard the term "rice eater" before....lol, I have heard of Tiger Mother and was aware of the stir it caused but not from the perspective of exploitation of the family but from the decidedly western view that this style of parenting is too harsh on the kids. As to desiring to associate with females who are success-oriented, well read, athletic, and do not aspire to be like britney spears...well I am 100% guilty But I fully understand your point now, that expecting any person perceived as Asian to have these characteristics or to adopt the trophy mentality, is as you put it, repellent. Your comment on disregarding the individuals spirit resonated with me as I feel this is a problem with society in general.

 

As always Mistress Zhao I am intrigued by your beauty, terrified of your power, and filled with a desire to pick your brain

 

So "yellow fever" is basically a modernized version of "orientalism", only more specific

 

I find this statement to be very loaded and interesting:

"This extends to stripping entire nations of humanity and leads to many people simply expecting certain actions or behaviors on the world stage as congruent with the behavior of the "other".

 

Racism is a double-edged knife. No, scratch that. It's a ninja star. So many ways to cut, dehumanize, degrade, antagonize, exploit. Also so many ways to celebrate, honor, embrace (but I suppose it's called patriotism or nationalism in this case).

 

Whatever the chosen term, it's the all too common behavior of humans to divide themselves based on something that could really bring us together, help us build ourselves to be stronger and more united.

The truth is, there is no "other".

We're all human, we are all connected (energetically) and we all bleed when cut. End of story.

 

Thank you, Cannon Fodder, for bring that to light.

[Mistress Zhao]

mZ,

 

I loved reading this post as I have often wondered about the view of an intelligent Asian female regarding "rice eaters". I always felt that I could easily be described in this manner. I am one that does find the Asian race of females to be physically attractive, but at the same time do not feel that I possess a trophy mentality where Asian women are concerned. I love what I see as pure individuality, as you pointed out, not modeling one self after a popular celebrity. Asian culture has always interested me as well. I guess if my love for Asian women were misunderstood and I were to discover that they found me to be repelling or repulsive, I honestly would feel devastated. Thanks for revealing Your thoughts on a subject which I find most interesting.

 

This "rice eater" phenomenon usually occurs in younger people who have yet to learn about all the subtleties of complex Asian women such as myself.

I'm sure that there many Asian girls out there who are thrilled and flattered to have their attention, and they can have it.

And I doubt you're a fly on shit.

Or are you?

[akiravn1]

This "rice eater" phenomenon usually occurs in younger people who have yet to learn about all the subtleties of complex Asian women such as myself.

I'm sure that there many Asian girls out there who are thrilled and flattered to have their attention, and they can have it.

And I doubt you're a fly on shit.

Or are you?

 

Literally, a fly on Your shit is a given, but as previously described in Your post as repulsive, I sincerely hope that I would never come across in that manner, as that clearly is not my intention and would never want to be perceived in such a way. Once again, I would like to thank You for addressing this subject, as Your opinion, that of a complex Asian Woman, is extremely valued.

[BibtyBoo]

 

Whatever the chosen term, it's the all too common behavior of humans to divide themselves based on something that could really bring us together, help us build ourselves to be stronger and more united.

The truth is, there is no "other".

We're all human, we are all connected (energetically) and we all bleed when cut. End of story.

 

Thank you, Cannon Fodder, for bring that to light.

 

Fuck yeah M Zhao! that is so nice to hear

[Cannon Fodder]

 

Whatever the chosen term, it's the all too common behavior of humans to divide themselves based on something that could really bring us together, help us build ourselves to be stronger and more united.

The truth is, there is no "other".

We're all human, we are all connected (energetically) and we all bleed when cut. End of story.

 

Thank you, Cannon Fodder, for bring that to light.

 

Thank you Mistress Zhao, I hope that someday, the world will recognize this simple truth. There is so much more to gain from each other than there is to take.

[Jung's Jewboy]

More so than "Asian fetish", this phenomenon is referred to as "Yellow Fever" and the males who have it "rice eaters" LOLOL

I'm not saying it's right or wrong, complementary or derogatory. It's just an obvious trend that appears to have resurfaced at some point congruous with the popularity of manga, anime, and cosplay. This is the second wave that I'm aware of, the first being "Orientalism" when non-Asians were fascinated with all things from The Orient in the early 19th century.

 

The common stereotype isn't necessarily about the submissiveness of females, but the distinctively Asian-ness to our upbringing and lives. We are neat and educated. We have high standards but are modest (ha). We do not model our behavior after the likes of Britney Spears or Paris Hilton, we opt for academia, classical music, and tennis. LOL

 

Have you ever read Tiger Mother by Amy Chua? It's a memoir of the author's upbringing by her typically Chinese mother and how she continues the tradition on her own children in a very self-aware manner. Much controversy was had over that book mainly because most Chinese would never dishonor or exploit their own families like that.

 

I do find some "rice eaters" to be repelling. Even repulsive. That's probably the experience of whomever you overheard. If they see an Asian girl, they're on her like flies to shit. She could be totally fobby or tattooed with green hair. Just as long as she's Asian. It's a trophy mentality and it disgusts me a little to have so little regard for a person's spirit and personality. To see them as an object to be won and possessed.

On the other hand, I have also experienced males who find the Asian race of females to be physically attractive, but that's about it. They're not laden with illusions about how we are all actually ninjas, or zen masters, or amazing cooks. It's purely physical so there's room for growth. The important difference is whether one honors an Asian female as an individual or a commodity.

 

Maam, you are a pleasure to read. I look forward to your comments on most toipics

[Jung's Jewboy]

The hottest accessory this summer is an Asian girlfriend. LOL

As for the Jewish man/Asian woman pairing, I can see how that trend would appear. We're both rather pragmatic and frugal about money!

 

 

Very funny but yes I think there is a thread of pragmatism and stoicism in both 'tribes' LOL

[deanroberts]

So you're saying that seeing more s&m and kink referred to on network television isn't mainstream?

While I agree with the concept of recycling trends, I think it also evolves and becomes more acceptable to a wider range of audience.

The world is expanding, making room for more and more ideas.

"Mainstream" as we know it is an amorphous channel for what is current and popular. Since the idea of mainstream keeps changing, so does our capacity to understand ideas that the newer generation sees for the first time and appropriates for further consumption.

 

Good points. So, my answer to the question is yes and no. S&M itself isn't becoming more mainstream, but overall, all forms of sexual practice are being employed by various media (especially film & television) to compete with other media channels that have take advantage of not being censored — namely, pay television and the Internet. I guess what I was saying is that it isn't S&M that is going mainstream, but that the overall milieu of sexuality is being tapped regardless of its practice in every day life.

[MrX]

More so than "Asian fetish", this phenomenon is referred to as "Yellow Fever" and the males who have it "rice eaters" LOLOL

I'm not saying it's right or wrong, complementary or derogatory. It's just an obvious trend that appears to have resurfaced at some point congruous with the popularity of manga, anime, and cosplay. This is the second wave that I'm aware of, the first being "Orientalism" when non-Asians were fascinated with all things from The Orient in the early 19th century.

 

The common stereotype isn't necessarily about the submissiveness of females, but the distinctively Asian-ness to our upbringing and lives. We are neat and educated. We have high standards but are modest (ha). We do not model our behavior after the likes of Britney Spears or Paris Hilton, we opt for academia, classical music, and tennis. LOL

 

Have you ever read Tiger Mother by Amy Chua? It's a memoir of the author's upbringing by her typically Chinese mother and how she continues the tradition on her own children in a very self-aware manner. Much controversy was had over that book mainly because most Chinese would never dishonor or exploit their own families like that.

 

I do find some "rice eaters" to be repelling. Even repulsive. That's probably the experience of whomever you overheard. If they see an Asian girl, they're on her like flies to shit. She could be totally fobby or tattooed with green hair. Just as long as she's Asian. It's a trophy mentality and it disgusts me a little to have so little regard for a person's spirit and personality. To see them as an object to be won and possessed.

On the other hand, I have also experienced males who find the Asian race of females to be physically attractive, but that's about it. They're not laden with illusions about how we are all actually ninjas, or zen masters, or amazing cooks. It's purely physical so there's room for growth. The important difference is whether one honors an Asian female as an individual or a commodity.

 

 

 

I would like to think that there are those who are at first intensely attracted on the surface to both the perceived physical and nonphysical asian female archetypes, but who also have enough life experience and discernment to dig deeper, so to speak. People are like snowflakes.

[ilnt]

More so than "Asian fetish", this phenomenon is referred to as "Yellow Fever" and the males who have it "rice eaters" LOLOL

I'm not saying it's right or wrong, complementary or derogatory. It's just an obvious trend that appears to have resurfaced at some point congruous with the popularity of manga, anime, and cosplay. This is the second wave that I'm aware of, the first being "Orientalism" when non-Asians were fascinated with all things from The Orient in the early 19th century.

 

The common stereotype isn't necessarily about the submissiveness of females, but the distinctively Asian-ness to our upbringing and lives. We are neat and educated. We have high standards but are modest (ha). We do not model our behavior after the likes of Britney Spears or Paris Hilton, we opt for academia, classical music, and tennis. LOL

 

Have you ever read Tiger Mother by Amy Chua? It's a memoir of the author's upbringing by her typically Chinese mother and how she continues the tradition on her own children in a very self-aware manner. Much controversy was had over that book mainly because most Chinese would never dishonor or exploit their own families like that.

 

I do find some "rice eaters" to be repelling. Even repulsive. That's probably the experience of whomever you overheard. If they see an Asian girl, they're on her like flies to shit. She could be totally fobby or tattooed with green hair. Just as long as she's Asian. It's a trophy mentality and it disgusts me a little to have so little regard for a person's spirit and personality. To see them as an object to be won and possessed.

On the other hand, I have also experienced males who find the Asian race of females to be physically attractive, but that's about it. They're not laden with illusions about how we are all actually ninjas, or zen masters, or amazing cooks. It's purely physical so there's room for growth. The important difference is whether one honors an Asian female as an individual or a commodity.

 

I am torn on this stuff.

 

Channeling my Inner Neanderthal:

 

This can all be overly intellectualized. After all, a hot chick is....just a hot chick and that's that; while a not-hot chick is still a nice person. Sometimes (assuming she's not angry at the world for being not-hot).

 

On the OTHER hand, the broad-brush application of the term "Asian" generally falls somewhere between simplistic, lazy and racist. What??? Well, kids, are there any differences between, say, an "average" (whatever the hell that is) Chinese woman and an "average" Japanese woman??? Duh, let me see....probably not that would occur to your average round-eye. It strikes me as fatuous to take Koreans, Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese etc and erase their distinctive ethnic and national identities by lumping them under the catchall term "Asian".

 

End of political sermon.

I hereby promise to return to my low-level pervert status on the Forum.

 

Sorry.

Won't let it happen again.

[Cannon Fodder]

I am torn on this stuff.

 

Channeling my Inner Neanderthal:

 

This can all be overly intellectualized. After all, a hot chick is....just a hot chick and that's that; while a not-hot chick is still a nice person. Sometimes (assuming she's not angry at the world for being not-hot).

 

On the OTHER hand, the broad-brush application of the term "Asian" generally falls somewhere between simplistic, lazy and racist. What??? Well, kids, are there any differences between, say, an "average" (whatever the hell that is) Chinese woman and an "average" Japanese woman??? Duh, let me see....probably not that would occur to your average round-eye. It strikes me as fatuous to take Koreans, Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese etc and erase their distinctive ethnic and national identities by lumping them under the catchall term "Asian".

 

End of political sermon.

I hereby promise to return to my low-level pervert status on the Forum.

 

Sorry.

Won't let it happen again.

 

No doubt that using the lump term "asian" is not very descriptive or specific and is rather unfair. However, the discussion was about "yellow fever" which is also a broad term, we aren't talking Sinophiles or Japan-amaniacs or people Koo Koo for Korea. You still make a good point though about painting any region with a broad brush...its like saying all Middle Eastern people are Arabs or everyone in the UK is English

[MrX]

I would like to think that there are those who are at first intensely attracted on the surface to both the perceived physical and nonphysical asian female archetypes, but who also have enough life experience and discernment to dig deeper, so to speak. People are like snowflakes.

Can I just amend my answer to say lovingly, but with significant frustration, that I've never been able to make any sense out of women, asian or otherwise? But I still can't do without them? Ok I'm done.

[Danny]

On the topic of S&M in the mainstream; have you ever imagined what Jennifer Anniston might be like as a Domme? At 1:52 in this video you'll get a taste. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rc47LcvIxyI

 

For the Mistresses at The Fortress, please don't get any ideas.

 

Danny

 

 

 

[Phred]

On the topic of S&M in the mainstream; have you ever imagined what Jennifer Anniston might be like as a Domme? At 1:52 in this video you'll get a taste. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rc47LcvIxyI

 

For the Mistresses at The Fortress, please don't get any ideas.

 

Danny

Nice kick in the nads! Also loved the hair tossing to "Baker Street"!

[Mistress Ree]

Nice kick in the nads! Also loved the hair tossing to "Baker Street"!

 

LOL, too bad we don't have a RealTime Slo-Motion machine.

[slavedog]

Just a few commercials...from the mainstream...

My link

 

 

 

 

 

 

My link

 

 

 

 

[Danny]

LOL, too bad we don't have a RealTime Slo-Motion machine.

 

You're bad.

 

 

 

[Phred]

LOL, too bad we don't have a RealTime Slo-Motion machine.

Don't need one - I can easily play back the sessions in my head in slo-motion. Your beauty is as vivid in my mind as it was during the session .

[shrimper]

Just curious if anyone has any opinion on s&m being in the mainstream via Rihanna...

 

I love the song. I thought she could have done more with the video, but I was glad that she put it out there being she has such a broad spectum of things she sings about and is not seen as extream. Maybe if more people see s&m as not being something bad it will remove some of the stigma associated with it.

[deanroberts]

Seems like Showtime really has gone S&M main-"stream".

 

The Shameless credit intro has always had a bathroom sequence with various males and females on the toilet. A few weeks ago, Emmy Rossum was on the toilet, looking at the camera and saying something like "here's what you missed last week." Last night's episode had a cute young girl pissing publicly on her father's gravestone. Not sure if the actress really did it, but it looked real enough. Unfortunately, not hot for obvious reasons.

 

Their new show House of Lies last night had a bizarre conversation between a pretty MILF and her pre-teen pseudo-tranny son, in which she implied she let someone piss on her (a sort of sugar daddy), and said to her son "Do you know what a golden show is?" WTF? Unfortunately, also not hot because of obvious reasons. A previous episode did have a scene where two wives snuck away fro their husbands to the restaurant bathroom. Of course they had sex in there. When the husbands found out, the seduced woman in an obvious unhappy relationship blurts out to her husband, "she made me squirt!"

 

Finally, previous two weeks of Californication. Three weeks ago, a Charlie Runkle meets a woman who once had sex with Charlie's ex-wife's current husband. She said "You know, he asked me to pee on him." She and confirmed she did, "I had to go. It seemed silly not to." And then the week following that episode, Charlie admits to paying for an online chat service (like Live Jasmin), and said "I got a girl to drink her own pee."

 

Does someone high up at Showtime have a watersports mandate? Probably not. I just think we've entered age of edge, where other forms of media need to compete with the Internet and general jadedness. Pushing boundaries. Right now, seems like we've entered a Golden Era of comedy.

[deanroberts]

Seems like Showtime really has gone S&M main-"stream".

 

The Shameless credit intro has always had a bathroom sequence with various males and females on the toilet. A few weeks ago, Emmy Rossum was on the toilet, looking at the camera and saying something like "here's what you missed last week." Last night's episode had a cute young girl pissing publicly on her father's gravestone. Not sure if the actress really did it, but it looked real enough. Unfortunately, not hot for obvious reasons.

 

Their new show House of Lies last night had a bizarre conversation between a pretty MILF and her pre-teen pseudo-tranny son, in which she implied she let someone piss on her (a sort of sugar daddy), and said to her son "Do you know what a golden show is?" WTF? Unfortunately, also not hot because of obvious reasons. A previous episode did have a scene where two wives snuck away fro their husbands to the restaurant bathroom. Of course they had sex in there. When the husbands found out, the seduced woman in an obvious unhappy relationship blurts out to her husband, "she made me squirt!"

 

Finally, previous two weeks of Californication. Three weeks ago, a Charlie Runkle meets a woman who once had sex with Charlie's ex-wife's current husband. She said "You know, he asked me to pee on him." She and confirmed she did, "I had to go. It seemed silly not to." And then the week following that episode, Charlie admits to paying for an online chat service (like Live Jasmin), and said "I got a girl to drink her own pee."

 

Does someone high up at Showtime have a watersports mandate? Probably not. I just think we've entered age of edge, where other forms of media need to compete with the Internet and general jadedness. Pushing boundaries. Right now, seems like we've entered a Golden Era of comedy.

 

A few typos. Apologies.

[Mistress Tran]

I love the song. I thought she could have done more with the video, but I was glad that she put it out there being she has such a broad spectum of things she sings about and is not seen as extream. Maybe if more people see s&m as not being something bad it will remove some of the stigma associated with it.

 

A little pop culture news: Rihanna and Chris Brown (former boyfriend who was charged with abuse) have just put out 2 songs together (remixes of each one of their songs). There has been a media backlash and questioning about how she would work with someone who had abused her. For me, it confirms what I always thought had happen in the first place. Two young people who are into BDSM and were not educated on the proper ways of playing and communication. It in turn went badly and because they are public figures, they were not allowed to say they were into such things and it turned into an abuse case. Now that time has gone by, she put out music talking about BDSM and the mainstream has slowly been accepting BDSM activities, so now she feels its "ok" to reunite with Chris Brown.

 

I do not condone abuse and their whole situation was very sad but for me and anyone into BDSM, it really highlights the importance of communication, proper play, and BDSM education. Obviously, we will never know what truly happen but from the public actions of both celebrities, I truly believe RiRi and Chris Brown have a BDSM relationship that is not communicated or handled correctly.

 

What are your thoughts?

[Milkdud]

A little pop culture news: Rihanna and Chris Brown (former boyfriend who was charged with abuse) have just put out 2 songs together (remixes of each one of their songs). There has been a media backlash and questioning about how she would work with someone who had abused her. For me, it confirms what I always thought had happen in the first place. Two young people who are into BDSM and were not educated on the proper ways of playing and communication. It in turn went badly and because they are public figures, they were not allowed to say they were into such things and it turned into an abuse case. Now that time has gone by, she put out music talking about BDSM and the mainstream has slowly been accepting BDSM activities, so now she feels its "ok" to reunite with Chris Brown.

 

I do not condone abuse and their whole situation was very sad but for me and anyone into BDSM, it really highlights the importance of communication, proper play, and BDSM education. Obviously, we will never know what truly happen but from the public actions of both celebrities, I truly believe RiRi and Chris Brown have a BDSM relationship that is not communicated or handled correctly.

 

What are your thoughts?

Mistress Tran,

I am not familiar with the particular selebraty situation but I think the key are the principles of safe, sane, and consensual as judged by the participants. One used to here these principles a lot around the fetish BDSM scene but not so much lately. Communication is of course essential, both verbal and nonverbal, but given the current legal climate, casual BDSM play is best done in monitored or pro dungeons and play spaces. Its good to practice negotiation skills but those who really need to seldom recognize that. Even in long term committed relationships, one needs to worry about marks being detected during medical visits or fall out after a break up. As touched on in a previous thread about 24/7 relationships, maintaining the expectation of a master or mistress/slave arrangement can be very difficult given the myriad of routine demands. And what real patern exists now for this arrangement? Still, there's nothing like the BDSM magic when you get it right;-)

LW