Verbal Abuse

[sean behan]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

[joey]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

 

i love verbal abuse! everything from making fun of my appeareance to racial slurs! i always feel like a million bucks after some great verbal! you just need time to get used to it.

[akiravn1]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

 

Sean,

 

In a certain way, I can see where you are coming from, as outside of a Fortress environment should something of that nature occur, I would probably develop similar feelings. However, I do harbor inner desires to be verbally abused by an Asian Mistress, so in that particular environment, I actually feel as if a certain need has been satisfied. I like being made known just how far below such a beautiful lady I really am. In my mind, I can separate the two scenarios, actual every day life versus session.

[patches]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

 

Hi sean behan,

 

Since you've been to the Fortress, I'm assuming you have access to the Devotee Forum. I wrote a short review which gives a little bit of detail of a session similar to yours, with one major difference. I really loved it. I'm sorry you did not have a good time with it, but I absolutely loved it and I'm still scarred by some of the words and comments they made to me. I'm a relatively young guy, but I'm very mature in the sense that I'm comfortable with myself. While they really made me question myself, there aren't many things I can change about myself that they insulted. Short of sounding like a psychologist, I won't worry too much about it. You've already taken it personally, but really it was exactly what you said "acting". Even if it wasn't, you wouldn't be you, if not for your shortcomings.

 

I don't care to share all the details of my session with the general public as I feel its between me and the Mistresses and I like to keep it as a fond memory, but if you would like more detail, I might consider it.

 

In any case, just make sure your next session isn't set up for such an attack if you aren't sure you can make it through.

 

Best,

Patches

[Mistress Tran]

Verbal abuse is a very hard topic in general as one persons definition of abuse is another persons pleasure. For me, verbal abuse can be fun but it also has to be enjoyable in some form for my sub. I enjoy "playing" which means consensual power exchange... that does not mean breaking someone to the point they are truly depressed. I dont think any of the Mistresses of The Fortress find it a badge of honor to break someone like that....I think we find pleasure in the control that is gained through truly understanding a subs wants and desires.

 

It saddens me to hear that the path you thought you wanted to go down ended with such pain which I guarantee was not the intended outcome. I hope you spend some time on the forum to read about other verbal abuse scenarios and can see that it can be fun but also understand that it may not be for you.

 

MTran

 

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

[TrackWarrior]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

 

Dude, I get that verbal abuse every night when I come home to

my wife......Just kidding! I'm no expert! All I can tell you is what

I have experienced. I played around with this lifestyle 25 years ago

and had some sessions that were not what I thought they would be.

It kept me away until about a year ago when I could no longer deny

the need to explore this. It's very easy to bite off more than you can

chew. People on this site share it all of the time. I think I'm most impressed

that you found a Domme who did what you asked. I'm assuming because

you posted here that you have not been to the Fortress. 90% of my

experience outside of the Fortress has been with Dommes who barely went

through the motions and just rushed through the session. I don't know

where you live but if you book here tell them what you went through

and what you are looking for. Think long and hard about where you

want to be at the end of your session. They make it very easy for you

to book here and bend over backwards to make sure you get the

session you are looking for. If you can't get here look for recommendations

about other Dommes and communicate your needs and interests. I

know thats not always easy. If you can do it book here. I have never been

disappointed. I hope you get some more feedback from some of the

other submissive hooligans here . Good Luck!

 

TrackWarrior

[Phred]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

Sorry that your session didn't go as planned. I've had some verbal abuse during my sessions, but it's been pretty light and so far enjoyable. I agree with everyone who's posted - look on the Devotee forum and learn from other people's experiences. I'm not sure how I would react to being broken by one of the Mistresses. Having had some harrowing experiences in the past in real life, I will share some thoughts with you.

 

You absolutely have to develop a thick skin and learn to shake things off right away (I know, easier said than done ). There have been times when I've been called on the carpet and verbally flogged in public - the only way to recover from something like that is to reach deep down inside, stand up straight and walk tall. Sometimes it takes more energy than you have at the moment, but you need to focus and put it behind you. I had an incident a few months ago at work that pretty much shook me to the core, and I was almost nonfunctional for a little while. It took one of my buddies to pull me aside, give me a stern talking to, boost me up and tell me to shake it off - I was finally able to do this and go about my work. Believe me, I know it's not easy...

 

We also need to learn from our experiences and grow and make changes. I remember seeing a colleague of mine get destroyed and brought to tears once after a prolonged tongue-lashing. I talked with her afterwards - she wasn't sad, but she became very angry. She became an unstoppable dynamo after this, probably one of the best coworkers I've had in a long time. She was simply amazing after that incident.

 

I always try to live by the mantra - "That which does not kill us, makes us stronger."

 

Hope this helps a little.

[Jung's Jewboy]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

 

Hmmm, verbal exchange, including abuse has always been part of what I need in a session and I can't say I've ever been hurt or damaged by it but maybe the damage is subtle?

 

I figure that , for example, having a Mistress mock you for your 'shortcomings' is a way of getting pleasure from your 'lot in life' by eroticizing it. I think an important component is the TONE of the verbal abuse. No doubt a harsher strident tone can be more impactful on ones psyche.

[sean behan]

I just want to thank everyone for taking the time to write and share your kind words and experience. After reading my original post I was suprised I didn't catch more verbal abuse for my misspellings and grammar but you all were very nice. I can see how one could get turned on by verbal abuse by your postings, but for me, it did the exact opposite. I turned inward and got numb . I felt so low I wanted to crawl under a rock and disappear. Maybe it's my disposition and over sensitivity and disliking certain things about myself that hearing them, all of them, and some new ones brought me back to some ugly times in life that have nothing to do with "fun". But it was a learining experience and as they say if you can't stand the heat stay out of the kitchen. Mistress Tran --thank you so much for your post. I also enjoy the playful exchange of power you described. I love submitting to beautiful women like yourself it's a real turn on. And sometimes there is a fine line between what is fun and play and what is not. You really put it elegantly , " finding pleasure in the control that is gained through truly understanding a subs wants and desires." Also like yourself I don't believe there was any intention by the Mistress to hurt me that deeply. Obviously, by the postings many enjoy this kind of verbal abuse.And when I told her I wished to stop she was kind and asked if I was ok and asked if I wanted to talk. At that time I touched on it briefly but I really didn't want to, I wanted to run. But all in all this was a learning experience to grow on. You were all very cool in responding and thank you so much. And Patches if there is a way to e-mail me on here I would love to hear your story. And hopefully after licking my wounds some more and some intense psycho-therapy (kidding) I will be able to return to the Fortress someday if they will have me. Until then best wishes --thanks Sean

[TrackWarrior]

I just want to thank everyone for taking the time to write and share your kind words and experience. After reading my original post I was suprised I didn't catch more verbal abuse for my misspellings and grammar but you all were very nice. I can see how one could get turned on by verbal abuse by your postings, but for me, it did the exact opposite. I turned inward and got numb . I felt so low I wanted to crawl under a rock and disappear. Maybe it's my disposition and over sensitivity and disliking certain things about myself that hearing them, all of them, and some new ones brought me back to some ugly times in life that have nothing to do with "fun". But it was a learining experience and as they say if you can't stand the heat stay out of the kitchen. Mistress Tran --thank you so much for your post. I also enjoy the playful exchange of power you described. I love submitting to beautiful women like yourself it's a real turn on. And sometimes there is a fine line between what is fun and play and what is not. You really put it elegantly , " finding pleasure in the control that is gained through truly understanding a subs wants and desires." Also like yourself I don't believe there was any intention by the Mistress to hurt me that deeply. Obviously, by the postings many enjoy this kind of verbal abuse.And when I told her I wished to stop she was kind and asked if I was ok and asked if I wanted to talk. At that time I touched on it briefly but I really didn't want to, I wanted to run. But all in all this was a learning experience to grow on. You were all very cool in responding and thank you so much. And Patches if there is a way to e-mail me on here I would love to hear your story. And hopefully after licking my wounds some more and some intense psycho-therapy (kidding) I will be able to return to the Fortress someday if they will have me. Until then best wishes --thanks Sean

 

Sean, I assumed this happened somewhere else. If it was a session at the FF I would still consider going back. I think Ms. Tran was right on. They want you to leave fulfilled with the experiences you are looking for. Don't beat yourself up. I would try again and let the domme aware of your last session. Good luck with whatever you decide to do Sean.

 

TW

[Wade]

Recently I had a session in which I requested verbal abuse. Unfortunately for me sometimes things that seem fun on paper, when you actually do them you find out you should be careful what you ask for. It seemed the Mistress was genuinely disgusted with me,every aspect of me, that I felt uncomfortable to be in her presence. Becuase of this after a time I was so saddened that i could'nt continue the session. It was'nt her fault , she was just brutally honest about her hatred. I know everybody is "acting" playing parts but it felt real and i hurt deeply, more than any physical pain I could ever recieve. So my question to other subs is has this ever happened to you? And to the Mistresses of the Fortress, does it give you great delight to give this kind of pain and do you find it a badge of honour to be able to break someone like that? Thanks

 

Just to let you know that you aren't the only one, I know exactly what you mean. Not to that level, but there have definitely been times where I've felt like "Wait, am I really serving that horribly? Does she actually think I am that incompetent?" For me that doubt is actually part of the release; outside of sessions I'm lucky enough to get a lot of the opposite, so to be able to just "feel small" is incredibly painful, but so is a hard smack to the feet.

 

All that said, it is still disorienting in a different way from physical pain sometimes! I won't pretend that the smile after a session or a comment on the message boards like "It was fun using you!" doesn't do a lot to make me feel like "Oh. Okay, right. That was part of the session."

 

(Also, sometimes I really am serving that horribly!)

[sean behan]

Sean, I assumed this happened somewhere else. If it was a session at the FF I would still consider going back. I think Ms. Tran was right on. They want you to leave fulfilled with the experiences you are looking for. Don't beat yourself up. I would try again and let the domme aware of your last session. Good luck with whatever you decide to do Sean.

 

TW

Thanks TW for the post and also everyone else. Yes this was at the Fortress but I am in no way blaming anyone for my experience but myself. I visited the Fortress twice prior to this and had a great time. The facility is great. The Mistresses were great ,helpful and beautiful. And this time around the Mistress asked if there was any limit to the verbal abuse she could use and I foolishly said no. So then when it got really mean spirited the sexiness of the situation just evaporated. She was very beautiful but I just couldn't see it then. Then it was like go through the motions ,grin and bear it. After a while I'm saying to myself I know she thinks I'm disgusting so I'm pretty sure she is not having a good time with this, I feel real disgusting so I'm not having a good time either,so then what is the point. The only blame is on me for not knowing what it entails. I have no blame for the Fortress at all. But maybe for me it's like watching stunts on TV , now don't none of you crazzy kiddies try this stuff at home. Maybe I'm better off on the sidelines living vicariously through your posts. Or maybe I'll stand up, dust myself off and come back to get my ass kicked once again. Either way it's cool. Thanks --Sean

[TrackWarrior]

Thanks TW for the post and also everyone else. Yes this was at the Fortress but I am in no way blaming anyone for my experience but myself. I visited the Fortress twice prior to this and had a great time. The facility is great. The Mistresses were great ,helpful and beautiful. And this time around the Mistress asked if there was any limit to the verbal abuse she could use and I foolishly said no. So then when it got really mean spirited the sexiness of the situation just evaporated. She was very beautiful but I just couldn't see it then. Then it was like go through the motions ,grin and bear it. After a while I'm saying to myself I know she thinks I'm disgusting so I'm pretty sure she is not having a good time with this, I feel real disgusting so I'm not having a good time either,so then what is the point. The only blame is on me for not knowing what it entails. I have no blame for the Fortress at all. But maybe for me it's like watching stunts on TV , now don't none of you crazzy kiddies try this stuff at home. Maybe I'm better off on the sidelines living vicariously through your posts. Or maybe I'll stand up, dust myself off and come back to get my ass kicked once again. Either way it's cool. Thanks --Sean

 

Sean,

To post this stuff on here shows incredible strength. It's also incredibly human. Dust yourself off, give yourself some time, but do not do what I did. Don't stuff down that urge, that draw, that feeling of the unknown.....whatever you want to call it. I put it on the shelf for 25 years and it was a big mistake. You have to do what is good for you Sean but don't let fear be the deciding factor. ttys.

 

TW

[akiravn1]

Thanks TW for the post and also everyone else. Yes this was at the Fortress but I am in no way blaming anyone for my experience but myself. I visited the Fortress twice prior to this and had a great time. The facility is great. The Mistresses were great ,helpful and beautiful. And this time around the Mistress asked if there was any limit to the verbal abuse she could use and I foolishly said no. So then when it got really mean spirited the sexiness of the situation just evaporated. She was very beautiful but I just couldn't see it then. Then it was like go through the motions ,grin and bear it. After a while I'm saying to myself I know she thinks I'm disgusting so I'm pretty sure she is not having a good time with this, I feel real disgusting so I'm not having a good time either,so then what is the point. The only blame is on me for not knowing what it entails. I have no blame for the Fortress at all. But maybe for me it's like watching stunts on TV , now don't none of you crazzy kiddies try this stuff at home. Maybe I'm better off on the sidelines living vicariously through your posts. Or maybe I'll stand up, dust myself off and come back to get my ass kicked once again. Either way it's cool. Thanks --Sean

 

My guess would be that after two previous visits to the Fortress in which you experienced a great time, that ultimately you will dust yourself off and come back for more. Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.

[sean behan]

My guess would be that after two previous visits to the Fortress in which you experienced a great time, that ultimately you will dust yourself off and come back for more. Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.

Thank you all for your encouragement and help . I'm glad you all found something that brings you so much pleasure. Maybe I'll be back. Still undecided. I feel better then when I wrote my first post-- esp when I said "it hurt more then any physical pain I could ever recieve". Looking back that might have been alittle melodramatic. I mean given a chance between getting knee capped with a pistol or castrated or scalded with hot oil or getting my feelings hurt I think I'll choose getting my feelings hurt;) Thank you guys alot . I wish you all the best. Have fun--Sean

[TrackWarrior]

Thank you all for your encouragement and help . I'm glad you all found something that brings you so much pleasure. Maybe I'll be back. Still undecided. I feel better then when I wrote my first post-- esp when I said "it hurt more then any physical pain I could ever recieve". Looking back that might have been alittle melodramatic. I mean given a chance between getting knee capped with a pistol or castrated or scalded with hot oil or getting my feelings hurt I think I'll choose getting my feelings hurt;) Thank you guys alot . I wish you all the best. Have fun--Sean

 

Sean,

 

I got scared for a second...... I thought maybe a tape of my last FF session got out, but I didn't get scalded with hot oil..... Be well Sean.

 

TW

[sean behan]

Sean,

 

I got scared for a second...... I thought maybe a tape of my last FF session got out, but I didn't get scalded with hot oil..... Be well Sean.

 

TW

Dude---you are way too hardcore lol . If you just glance my nuts with a kick , if I feel the air I double over. I mean shit, they are small but there all I have lol---Sean