demasiado Posted January 14, 2014 Report Share Posted January 14, 2014 I've had the pleasure of playing with Mistress Zhao several times now and in that time much of our play has been centered around pain play. Over the weekend I was discussing masochism with an acquaintance and she mentioned how she found masochism confusing so I thought I would think about mine a little more deeply. I actually don't like pain... well, I don't like most forms of pain. Nipple play is in its own weird little world. How can something hurt and feels so good at the same time (like wha?!?)? After my last meeting with Mistress Zhao my nipples were killing me as I walked to the train leaving the Fortress. I felt like the clamps she had applied to them must still be on and seriously wondered if my poor little nipples might fall off on the way home. Yet an hour or two later as I watched Marky Mark get shot up on the hills of Afghanistan I noticed I missed the pain and found myself half subconsciously reach up to surreptitiously pinch my nipples to bring back the pain in the dark of the movie theater. So, if I don't like most forms of pain why would I explore masochism? If I'm playing with someone who will derive some positive emotion from the pain then the act of receiving pain is a form of service. An act of obedience and subordination that'll make Her wetter than a duck in a rainstorm. Doing that makes me feel submissive. One of the other ways Mistress Zhao will get into my head is to give me a challenge while we do pain play. So I shouldn't move while being shocked, or not drop something that's she has placed in my hand or express my pain openly (more challenging than expected!) while experiencing it. Concentrating on the pain and the challenge concurrently => big time synaptic plasticity. Pushing myself to tolerate the pain also internally reinforces my strength and toughness which among the ways I view myself. In addition, there can be this sublime moment when pushed a bit further than I think I can go where everything goes away. It's peaceful and meditative and sometimes powerful memories can rush back in when that empty space gets instantly filled back up. When someone takes me there I feel so grateful and just want to melt into her and surrender myself. It happened last time I met Mistress Zhao. She took me to that space and I felt totally empty and grateful as I kissed her hand to thank her. All of a sudden, I thought of an important person to me and was briefly stunned with emotion. It's not always pain. Sometimes emotional or physical discomfort that isn't painful can have the same effect. There was a powerful moment when Mistress Zhao chose to open my throat... she was atop me with her fingers deep in the back of my pharynx. I struggled to overcome primitive reflexes and do as she told me. Something about the devious wickedness in her eyes and the way she calmly coaxed me made me feel... so... forced and vulnerable and more... Anyways, a big thank you to Mistress Zhao. For those who haven't met her she is much more than a sadist. I also love exploring my kinks of being forced or controlled or trained or pleasing her. I find the electricity of her nearness to be very dear when we play. She always makes me laugh, does something magical, allows me to explore vulnerability, flabbergasts me and teaches me something. Sometimes, she befuddles me but that's a limit we only approach with extreme caution. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Posted January 14, 2014 Report Share Posted January 14, 2014 A great insight and view of Mistress Zhao. Thanks for posting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manpeach Posted January 14, 2014 Report Share Posted January 14, 2014 I share many of these same emotions, demasiado. I am not a pain slut either, but I find it opens a passage into my mind and allows me to surrender control. Mistress Zhao is especially skilled and compassionate about opening that door. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Zhao Posted January 14, 2014 Report Share Posted January 14, 2014 demasiado, Thank you for your brilliantly thoughtful explanation on the joy of masochism. It's not exclusively pain for pain's sake, it's the opportunity of transcendence that masochists and sadists like myself seek. I hope we get many opportunities to get to that state, and I look forward to befuddling you more Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Posted January 15, 2014 Report Share Posted January 15, 2014 For me masochism is about transfering trust and control. This Mistress has the ability to truly hurt, but not harm. The controlled bondage allows for complete hopelessness and loss of control over your own body. The trust is knowing that the Mistress is in complete control. Having the session be no mercy is the complete transfer of control and trust combined. At least that is my current mindset for the sessions I am experiencing now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zorba1 Posted January 15, 2014 Report Share Posted January 15, 2014 No text appears. What is the problem? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Posted January 17, 2014 Report Share Posted January 17, 2014 Other than the message with the text in it, you are correct. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted January 17, 2014 Report Share Posted January 17, 2014 That was a weird little exchange there zorba (?!) Howard, what a great review and insight ;-) The part when you talked about how you hurt your own nipples again made me think of how it feels to press hard on a healing scab to satisfy an almost indescribable "itch". PS I saw that movie too! Was good. As with all films that are "based on true story", I wish I knew how much of the nuances were true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arby Posted January 17, 2014 Report Share Posted January 17, 2014 For some of us, there is nothing in the original text box other than two smiley emoticons. Perhaps can't see it if using an apple product? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
demasiado Posted January 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted January 18, 2014 demasiado, Thank you for your brilliantly thoughtful explanation on the joy of masochism. I look forward to befuddling you more Fo shizzle, my dizzle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
demasiado Posted January 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted January 18, 2014 I hope we get many opportunities to get to that state, and I look forward to befuddling you more Fo shizzle, my dizzle! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
demasiado Posted January 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted January 18, 2014 That was a weird little exchange there zorba (?!) Howard, what a great review and insight :wink: The part when you talked about how you hurt your own nipples again made me think of how it feels to press hard on a healing scab to satisfy an almost indescribable "itch". PS I saw that movie too! Was good. As with all films that are "based on true story", I wish I knew how much of the nuances were true. Hey!!! Give me my props!! Thanks Mistress Kang for inspiring me to write a bit. It does kinda feel like poking at a scab... Lone Survivor was pretty good. The ending strays from the book a fair amount. It's an interesting question in terms of how realistic it is -- since he was the lone survivor he's the only witness to the meat of the story. You gotta wonder how well anyone can really remember anything when they are in 100% full on fight/flight mode. I'm sure the book is true to his memory of events -- how closely does that adhere to what really happened? How about an experiment? Sit in on an intense, long session. Afterwards, write down your recollections and then debrief the client and Mistress. See how closely each perspective adheres to the other. We could probably turn it into a paper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anubis Posted January 18, 2014 Report Share Posted January 18, 2014 That was great to read, can't wait to experience Mistress Zhao for myself. Bit confused about the throat opening part, did she actually cut it open? The text is white (invisible) on the mobile site for some reason. You can either highlight the text or switch to the desktop version, royboy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted January 19, 2014 Report Share Posted January 19, 2014 For some of us, there is nothing in the original text box other than two smiley emoticons. Perhaps can't see it if using an apple product? Hmm..not an Apple product issue because we use an iMac, Macbook, and Air without a hitch. Maybe iPhone? Please feel free to email if you need help troubleshooting OK? [email protected] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Posted January 19, 2014 Report Share Posted January 19, 2014 Hmm..not an Apple product issue because we use an iMac, Macbook, and Air without a hitch. Maybe iPhone? Please feel free to email if you need help troubleshooting OK? [email protected] You have Apple surrounded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anubis Posted January 19, 2014 Report Share Posted January 19, 2014 It's the mobile version that causes it, it's invisible on my Samsung Galaxy Note 2 too but I just switch to the Full Version using the button below. Not all text is affected though so that's strange. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistress Kang Posted January 19, 2014 Report Share Posted January 19, 2014 Hey!!! Give me my props!! Thanks Mistress Kang for inspiring me to write a bit. It does kinda feel like poking at a scab... Lone Survivor was pretty good. The ending strays from the book a fair amount. It's an interesting question in terms of how realistic it is -- since he was the lone survivor he's the only witness to the meat of the story. You gotta wonder how well anyone can really remember anything when they are in 100% full on fight/flight mode. I'm sure the book is true to his memory of events -- how closely does that adhere to what really happened? How about an experiment? Sit in on an intense, long session. Afterwards, write down your recollections and then debrief the client and Mistress. See how closely each perspective adheres to the other. We could probably turn it into a paper. Half of that potential paper happens whenever I read a review written by my sub about a session we shared! It's truly eye-opening to learn how his perspective of the same event varies from my own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arby Posted January 19, 2014 Report Share Posted January 19, 2014 Thanks, Anubis, for the IT advice. Had not been able to read the start of the thread on my IPhone or iPad. Switched to full version as you suggested and not a problem. demasiado's post and the thread is very informative. Have a first ever session with Mistresses Zhao this week - along with Mistress Tran whom I sessioned with once - and it will be my first real experience with Masochism. Really looking forward to it. I expect it will be a learning experience like no other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Posted January 19, 2014 Report Share Posted January 19, 2014 I am certain you will. Much can be learned from Mistress Zhao she has such a broad range of experience and focus when she is being a sadist. Good luck, write a review after if you can. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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